My role as a parent in the community

I write this post now as I enter the new frontiers of becoming a parent. It is an exciting and at times nerve-wrecking experience but it always provides for interesting thoughts and reflections to take place.

Credits: CheekyC

One of the major adjustments needed after having a child is in my daily schedule, and both of us do have a busy schedule. Other than holding a day job, we are also occupied with programmes offering spiritual education to communities with the aim of creating unity in the many neighbourhoods around the country. These programmes are arranged in three distinct age groups - children; junior youth; and youth and adults. Find more about it here. 

As such, with my daughter now beginning to be more engaging, we find ourselves needing to dedicate more time to her upbringing. So the question then arises if we should reduce the time we are giving to those community building activities I mentioned earlier. This question may seem obvious enough, especially if it is just for these few years that we give more of our time to our daughter. Of course the community will not suffer in these few years and there are others who are at a more conducive time in their lives to work for the community as well. 

But something did not feel right.

As we struggled to find the time and the energy to continue working for the betterment of our neighbourhood, something became increasingly clear to us. 

What is it that we actually want to provide for our child?  A loving community for her to grow up in.

Copyright © Bahá'í International Community

I think that many social forces around us mold our thoughts about upbringing to be related to that of financial security, good schools, good grades and physical security. Surely all these are valid. However, strong thoughts of individualism are also influencing us to often think of the individual child, that every child to fend for themselves and that it is our duty as parents to equip our children with the best so that he or she can fend off 'others' on their own. And somehow this is the idea of independence which we have created - one which is largely centred on the individual.

What about the community? Is there nothing that we can do as parents to help create a better community for our children?

When did the 'I' become separated from the 'we'?

Copyright © Bahá'í International Community

I strongly believe that we were not meant to live our lives focused on ourselves as individuals but also on who we can be as a united whole. It is in this very notion that we continue to labour within our neighbourhoods so that one day, our children or their children may grow up in a neighbourhood built on solid material and spiritual foundations.

We, of course, do not expect that our daugher will grow up in a rosy care-free world. Most likely not, but when did we, as a community lose our collective will to do something about it? It's not a simple matter as well and we acknowledge its complexity. And to move through these waters, definitely a mode of learning needs to be adopted, one which is accompanied by consistency and perseverance.

I think in this sense, it gives me more solace when I think about it.

We serve at the pleasure of the community, a community made up of you and me.